When I was very young, I was manipulated into sex reassignment (also known as sex/gender correction or sex/gender transition) by a transsexual man in his mid-40s.
For several years he gave me puberty blockers – dangerous substances that block the effects of testosterone – and hormones of the opposite sex, i.e. estrogens.
Just before I turned 18, a psychologist, psychiatrist, and sexologist, after one visit, without any tests, fabricated a diagnosis of transsexualism and referred me, officially, for a sex change, which should never have happened.
Currently, I have had a reversal procedure, returning to the true sex I was born with, which I am very happy about. This story is described below.
I’m gay and that has a lot to do with the story. When I was 12, I struggled with a lack of self-acceptance. I already knew that I liked people of the same sex.
For the first time, I experienced my childhood ‘crush’ on vacation, where my family and I went every summer.
Fishing every day at 5 am, I met a boy a year older than me who was there in summer camp. I felt for him what I would call exactly what I wrote a moment ago: a childlike crush with no reference to sexuality or physical contact at all. I was 7, maybe 8 years old.
It is at this age that many children first find themselves with this type of innocent fascination with a person of the opposite sex or, for gays and lesbians, of the same sex.
I never met him again, but subsequent events in my life clearly indicated that I like people of the same sex. It was only later that I began to realize that this was unusual, even considered undesirable.
The awareness that I was attracted to people of the same sex matured in me very slowly and gradually.
Over time, being in the older classes of primary school and then junior high school, I knew that I did not like the girls at all: neither emotionally nor physically. Same-sex couples were not accepted and were actively condemned. In fact, they were ridiculed, and calling someone ‘gay’ was an offensive epithet.
As I pondered my future, I increasingly thought that a normal, healthy, gay life would be impossible. I also developed a belief that same-sex attraction is wrong.
Contrary to stereotypes, it did not result from religion lessons, because I met a similar, only milder, negative view of homosexuality first in high school; I can’t recall our quite strict nun in junior high school ever expressing a negative attitude towards gays.
It is difficult to hide homosexual orientation in adolescence and as many lesbians and gay men know, it is a great reason for peers who find out about it or suspect it, to ridicule, offend, insult or threaten, by, for example, saying that this will be broadcast to everybody.
Read More: When I was 14 a 40-year-old transsexual manipulated me into changing sex
