Our names are intricately entwined with our identity, family, culture and heritage. However, it can also be associated with generational trauma, distress, discrimination, dysphoria and can trigger painful emotions. While our names are our primary markers, they do not define us. If you do not relate to your name, or it makes you feel lousy, changing your name is the best way to reclaim your happiness, or even reinstating and establishing your identity. You can simply use the UK Deed Poll Office to change your name without much hassle. Choosing your new name can be a fun and interesting experience as well. But with the sea of options, it can also be quite difficult. Here are a few tips to help you choose the perfect new name for yourself.ed
Choose Something That Affirms Your Identity
Your new name becomes a big part of your identity, and it is what you will be called, likely for the rest of your life, so choose it very carefully. Test out different names and see how it feels, when you are referred to by it. Often a name in theory sounds nice, but does not come out as good when uttered. Do not rush into picking a name, just because you have to. Take your time, take it slow and pick, only when your chosen name makes you feel completely at peace and yet euphoric about the choice.
Sentimental Connection
A great way to choose a new name is to look into things and/or people who hold a sentimental value to you. It could be a kind grandparent who decided to be your rock when you came out, or a beautiful ethnic name that binds you to your culture and traditions. Some people even choose a name that is similar to their old name, to avoid confusion. Conversely, you could also pick a name very different to your old name, to avoid any similarity, and provide you the much-needed distance from your old identity.
Connections To Avoid
One’s name can be a major source of trigger as well, leading to the need for the said change. While choosing your new name, elimination is a great way to shortlist name ideas. A list of all your triggers, it could be something ranging from family, particular media or any incident that caused you pain, can be a good guideline to avoid specific names. Association with problematic characters or personalities that clash with your personal beliefs and politics helps you avoid future triggers. Another thing to keep in mind is to not pick a name that appropriates others culture, as it is offensive and inappropriate.
Pick A Name That Inspires You
Changing your name is a powerful act of establishing yourself, your identity and reclaiming your power. It offers you a chance to let go of everything that held you down, made you weak and emerge over all of those. Everyday of your life, you will be addressed by the name you choose, so what better than something that inspires and strengthens you, and makes you proud! You can look into your childhood idols, powerful historical or contemporary persons, inspirational characters, a link to your identity or history and more for such inspiration.
Look Into Something You Are Passionate About
A great place to look for inspiration is in things you are passionate about. Fictional characters from your favourite books or media could serve as an excellent resources to help you choose your new name. Another place to look for is any music you deeply resonate with, something that helped you get through difficult times, or what you listen to whenever you need something to soothe you. Your passions can be a great source of happiness for you, making them the perfect place to seek your new name!
Consider How It Ages
There’s a high chance that you wouldn’t want to through the red tape of changing your name multiple times so test out how your name ages with time. You might find it tempting to name yourself after a character in a show or book you are presently digging, but what if the character development turns out to be problematic or uninspiring later with the passage of time! Opt for something that you are sure would sit well with you in a decade or more.
Try To Keep It Easy
While an incredibly uncommon name or quirky spelling of a common one sounds like an interesting choice, there is a high chance that people around you would end up spelling or pronouncing it wrong. An easy to spell and pronounce name would save you the hassle of constantly correcting people every time a mistake happens. While in everyday life it can be a minor inconvenience, you might face some hassle if such an error occurs in an official space.
Your name is tied to your identity, but it does not define you. Opting to give up your dead name and changing it to something that affirms your gender, choices or makes you happy, is an incredibly powerful choice.
