Elite sportsmen and women put their bodies through unbelievable stress and strain. They push themselves to the limit, all for that extra 1% that could put the ball into the net, or secure a home run. How is it then, that such finely tuned athletes manage to cripple themselves in such bizarre circumstances? Don’t worry, there is no question of health care fraud. These injuries actually happened.
Here is our top ten.
Marty Cordova, Baltimore Orioles, Baseball – Marty missed a fairly long stretch of MLB games, with horrific facial burns. A dreadful injury that probably wouldn’t have made the list, if he hadn’t done it by falling asleep in a tanning booth.
Alex Stepney, Manchester United, Football – During a match in 1975, Manchester United goalkeeper Alex Stepney became so enraged by the performance of his team mates, that he decided to give them a piece of his mind. He ended up giving them a bit more than that, as he went into such a verbal tirade, that he managed to dislocate his own jaw in the process.
Dustin Penner, Los Angeles Kings, Ice Hockey – We’re still as confused about Dustin Penner’s injury now, as we were when we first read about it. The Los Angeles Kings forward missed several NHL games in the 2012 season by severely straining his back. Hockey is a violent sport, and back strains are far from the more horrific injuries hockey players will suffer in a career. Difference is, Dustin did it eating pancakes.
Dave Beasant, Chelsea, Football – In 1993, when goalkeeper of Chelsea football club, Dave Beasant thought it would be a good idea to show off his juggling skills. Unfortunately he chose to use a glass bottle of salad dressing, ending in almost inevitable disaster. A severed tendon in Dave’s toe kept him off the pitch for some time.
Tom Glavine, Atlanta Braves, Baseball – No one really likes airplane food. It’s just something you suffer as part of the travelling experience. None of us have suffered quite as much as Tom Glavine, though. He was so violently sick after one such meal, that he managed to crack two of his ribs.
Glenn Healy, Toronto Maple Leafs, Ice Hockey – Glenn Healy should be remembered for being part of the 1994 Stanley Cup winning New York Rangers team. Instead, he went down in infamy for having one of the most bizarre excuses for an injury. Healy suffered hand lacerations that meant he missed several Maple Leafs games in the 2000 season. How did you do that, Glenn? …Changing the bag on my bagpipes. OK.
Bobby Cruickshank, Golfer – While competing in 1934, the Scottish golfer played such a wonderful shot, that he celebrated by throwing his club high into the air. So distracted was he with his putt, that he forgot that at some point, gravity would cause the club to crash back down to earth. It landed on Bobby’s head, and knocked him unconscious.
Matt Bonner, San Antonio Spurs, Basketball – Matt Bonner suffered from tennis elbow during the 2015 season, with fans critical of what they considered some poor performances. Unfortunately the reason given for Bonner’s injury did very little to placate the situation. Apparently the 6’10” forward was rendered incapacitated because the Apple iPhone 6 was too big. Just how much time does he spend on the phone?
Darius Vassell, Aston Villa, Football – The England striker was suffering with a blood blister on his toe, while playing for Aston Villa in 2002. We’ve all been there. They are really sore and a nightmare to burst without causing even more pain, or worse, infection. Don’t worry though, Darius worked out a way to burst his blood blister without any risk of further injury or infection. He used a power drill. Yeah, what could possibly go wrong?
Clarence Blethen, Boston Red Socks, Baseball – This injury can only make sense when you explain that it took place in 1923. Clarence Blethen thought he would try and intimidate the opposing pitcher, by taking out his false teeth, and slipping them into his back pocket. He gave the pitcher a toothless smile, and it worked quite well until a few moments later, while sliding into second base, Clarance had his backside gashed by his own teeth.